my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
