I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
