I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
