We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize