We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I had to cum in my sink.
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