your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
