I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
