she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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