My brain says no but my pants say off.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
