Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
