I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
