what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
