you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
