I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
