Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
