Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
