i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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