is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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