I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
