you turned your livingroom into a bong?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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