Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Randomize
