If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
