I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
