that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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