did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
