The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
