I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize