you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I lost the right to judge tonight
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
