It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
