pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
this will be a night to untag.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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