wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
wow bdsm is so cute
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
