1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
All I want is dick and wine.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
