You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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