I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
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