Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize