Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
