I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
