OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
