It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
