Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
