listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
