GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
