just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize