so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
