Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
