We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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