some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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