so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I believe in your delicious
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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