I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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