Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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