Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
